Why It's Not Ok to Mum Shame

by Matilda Miles

Mum-shaming is such a common thing to come across, in playgrounds, baby groups anywhere in general.

So why do we do it? Everyone is guilty of doing from time to time. Judging people for everything is everywhere, the media is the worst culprit of them all.

From not losing the baby weight soon enough to not breastfeeding!

We are all different and will never be the same as the next person that’s what makes life fun. Why be sheep when you can be a unicorn?

We judge because ultimately it makes us feel better about ourselves.

'look at her, she always has so much makeup on, I wonder what her kids do whilst she gets herself selfie-ready' how about thinking wow she looks amazing I wonder what kind of make-up she wears.

She might do her make-up so flawlessly because it’s the one thing she can do all day that's just for her and no-one else!!

'OMG, her outfit doesn't do her any favours, she looks like she's still pregnant 2 years on'

how about I like the jeans or her shoes, she must be really body confident.

And fuck yes she should be confident in her body because she gave birth and carried a tiny human inside of her. Some women are naturally gifted of being like rubber bands, they can be stretched but will snap right back to their original shape, others like myself do not have that gift and have to work extremely hard to even lose 5lbs. Other women may have a condition that does not make it easy to get pregnant and/or lose weight.

I could use so many examples but you get the picture. Don't go for the black and white reasoning or judgements.

Think about how you would feel if people thought these kinds of things about you. We as women and as mother's raising the future generation should set an example and build each other up not tear them down.

We should leave behind the secondary school bitching and obsessiveness over what people look like or how to do things. It doesn't benefit anyone, yes it might make you better but only for a short time. Being positive and kind lasts longer and can change people and bring people together.

You never know what goes on behind close doors, so you will never know the reasoning behind the things people do. They might not be able to breastfeed because they had a double mastectomy.

You will never know until you stop judging.

Be kind and positive.

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Written by

Matilda Miles

Matilda Miles
My name is Matilda but everyone calls me Tilly, I'm a first time mum to a little boy called Dexter who was born 6 weeks early but luckily was very healthy considering. I'm the youngest of 6 and raised by my mum who has been a huge support and my go-to person. I'm also a huge Disney obsessed fan and am a huge animal person and I have a very grumpy cat who is very protective of my son. I also suffer from severe post-natal depression but I'm in the road to recovery and I'm also in the midst of writing a book about it all.

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