My Experience of C-Section Stigmas

by Charlotte Zealey

C sections are becoming more common in the UK. Now around 1 in 4 births in the UK are via c section. However, people do still see it as the easy way out. Today I want to share with you some of the things which people have said to me as a result of having c-sections. Usually, this happens because people see it as a lot easier than having a natural delivery. This is not something that I could comment on as I have had two c-sections.

I had an emergency one with Jess and then an elect c-section with Troy. The emergency one with Jess definitely saved her life. Her heart rate was dipping crazy low and she had to be born ASAP. I actually remember asking if it mattered if I signed the consent forms properly. They joked you could sign as Mickey Mouse but you'd still need a C Section. This just goes to show that they can save lives. With Troy, I choose to have a c section for reasons I will share later. Of course, a c-section is not an easy way out at all, it is major abdominal surgery. Apparently, it is one of the biggest operations which hospitals do now without it being keyhole. 

It’s the Easy Way

I have, of course, had people say to me that it is the easy way out. Of course, it is not an easy way out, after all, it is major surgery. There are not many times which you would choose to have an operation of this scale so quickly. For me, with the emergency one, I remember being told to read the consent form. I think I was that nervous that I never properly read it let alone signed it. Usually, you would weigh up the pro's and con's but with a c section, this doesn’t happen, well not an emergency one. It has to be done ASAP. I think from the time I was told I needed a C section to having it was less than 45 minutes. Of course, there is also the recovery to deal with, which is so hard. Not being able to lift heavy things at all. I remember not being able to walk properly for a couple of weeks. So, for sure I do not think it is the easy way out. No matter how you give birth, it is hard.

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Too Posh to Push

I have had people say to me "oh your too posh to push". This was mainly when I was having Troy via c section. However, I was not too posh to push at all. I had the option as a result of my emergency one. Even the consultant I was under said in my situation this is something which she would have done. There was so much that happened after I gave birth to Jess. I had a postpartum haemorrhage, which resulted in me losing a lot of blood, in total, I think I ended up losing about ¼ of my whole blood supply. I felt it would be safe to have another c-section and be monitored more closely after. I will never know if this was the right option. However, what I do know is the birth of my son was a lot less traumatising. Sadly, I knew there was a slightly increased risk that this would happen again. I was lucky it didn’t happen again. I was on a small ward post-c-section with only 4 other people, we had all had c-sections which meant the care was amazing. I didn’t want to die giving birth, this could have happened if this was to happen again without anyone knowing. Luckily my mum was there to press the emergency button with Jess. It was that bad I even had the crash team on standby.

Missed Out on Childbirth

I have also been asked if I feel like I missed out on childbirth. Well, no because in the end, I ended up with two healthy children. Just because I didn’t give birth to them naturally doesn’t mean I didn’t give birth to them. You would not ask someone who had adopted or fostered their children if they felt like they missed out on the childbirth. So why would you to someone that has had a c-section? No, I don’t feel like I have missed out, after all, I carried them for 9 months. I am just glad that I ended up having healthy children. Nobody can tell who has been born by c-section or who has been born naturally so why does it matter. I could have chosen to try and have a natural birth with Troy but it is what I wanted to do.

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At Least He Didn’t Destroy you

When Troy was born at 9lb 9oz at 39 weeks. I had people saying well at least he didn’t destroy you. No, but I still ended up with a huge scar that over time is going to fade. There was a lot of pain of course because it was major surgery. You would not go to someone who had a natural birth who had a big baby and comment if the baby had destroyed you. That would be seen as rude so I don’t know why people make this comment. I know he may have ended up weighing more at birth if we had let him come naturally. As there is no guarantee that he would have come at that stage and would have continued to pile on the weight. This could have caused problems and ended up with me having to have a c-section anyway.

 At least You Weren’t Waiting

I have had people tell me that I had it easy because I didn’t have hours waiting or in labour. Well, I don’t think I am that lucky, with Jess I was induced and then her heart rate dropped having been in the hospital for over 24 hours. I still had a lot of pain in my back because she was back-to-back. I was also overdue with Jess, she was born 5 days after her due date so I did have to wait for her. With Troy I know I was lucky because he was the first c-section of the day, however, there could have been a long wait. After all elect c-sections get pushed back if there are some emergency ones. They can get cancelled, you can get your hopes up that you are going to meet your little bundle of joy on that day and then it's cancelled. This is something that I think would be one of my worse nightmares.

If you have had a c-section have you ever had some horrible comments as a result of this?


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Written by

Charlotte Zealey

Blogger
Hi I am Charlotte a 20 something year old Mum to 3 Year Old Jess. We are based in West Yorkshire. We are an armed forces family which means that there is periods of time when Dad is away. This has mean me and Jess have become so close. I blog over at www.cupsofcharlotte.co.uk where we share a wide range of different content from reviews of days out and products which we are loving. We also share tips and tricks. We have shared everything from swapping third year university for a 3 week old baby, to how to complete your degree with a toddler. I share our journey as we continue to bring up Jess. We would love it if you would join us on our journey.

Articles on YourBabyClub.co.uk are a mixture of informative pieces, anecdotal accounts and professional advice from our panel of Bloggers, Writers and Experts. The views and opinions expressed in these articles are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the official view of Your Baby Club UK

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