To Do or Not to Do: Finding Out the Sex of Your Baby


It’s such a tough decision when you have to decide whether to find out the sex of your baby. For some people, they decide they want to know before they even get pregnant. I have had friends who said there was no doubt in their mind that they would find out when they got to the 20-week scan. For others, they think it’s a nice surprise to wait until baby arrives.

After all, we have all heard the stories where the baby turns out to be the other sex! Of course, it doesn’t matter- you will love your baby whatever. When they arrive in your arms, the sex of your baby is irrelevant; the only thing that matters is they are here in your arms. However,I know gender disappointment is real- I’ve heard first hand that people have experienced this at their scan or when they birthed their baby. Everyone will have an opinion on finding out the sex of course. From trying to guess, to telling you what they would prefer, it can be overwhelming.

For us, we decided both times that we would find out the sex if we could at the scans. There is no right or wrong way of doing it; the decision you make is right for you both. We never regretted finding out the sex while my friends who didn’t have also felt they made the right decision. Here are some of the reasons why we decided both times to find out the sex at the 20-week scan.

We could prepare for the child

While it’s not essential to know if you are having a boy or girl, I think it does make it easier to prepare for the child. For instance, you might opt for a different nursery design depending on the sex. Knowing the sex also might affect your choice of pram and car seat. And while you can get some neutral choices for clothes, there is more which is suited for one sex or other. I found it difficult to find much stuff which would be ok for both sexes when looking at shops. In fact, it can be frustrating how much pink or blue there is; I wish the shops did do more colourful options which would be ok for both! I know friends who have boys have said there is a lot more for girls than there is for boys too!

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Helps you to envisage your baby

I found it much more real once I knew the sex of the baby. I found calling the baby ‘her’ made it more real and exciting. And I know some people like to choose the name then and they start calling the baby by their name. It can help you prepare for the reality heading your way.

You can prepare siblings

If it’s your second baby, you need to prepare them for their new sister or brother arriving in due course. If you can tell them what the baby will be, it can help make it more real for them. You can even get them more used to the idea by calling the baby their little sister or brother.

Nice surprise before birth

Let’s face it, 9 months is a long slog sometimes! You feel like some months go really slow while others go super fast during pregnancy. Therefore, getting to know a little more about your baby feels like a bit of a treat before they are born! It’s a nice surprise halfway through your pregnancy and it’s exciting to share with others; whether you want to host a gender reveal or put it on social media. It allows you an extra way to get excited about the new arrival.

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No guessing from others 

Of course, it can be fun to try and guess the sex of your baby. In fact, there is a lot of games at baby showers you can play where you can try to guess the sex of the baby. But it can be annoying when people are constantly asking you if you know what you are having, or even worse what you want. Therefore, being able to tell people stops all this in its tracks.

You can use items from your first child 

Again for parents of second or third or fourth babies, knowing the sex means you can use stuff you already have for your little one. Once we knew we were having another girl, we didn’t have to worry about getting certain clothes as we had it already! 

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