What It's Really Like Raising 3 Kids

by Amanda Motsu

When I had my kids, I had always known I didn’t want them too many years apart, I remember trying to have my second baby when her sister was only 3 months old partly because I didn’t want to have different fathers for my babies in case things didn’t work out, some may call it a silly reason but today I have 2 girls aged 10 and 9, and a son going onto 7. And yeah I am with their father.

The interesting part is their dad stays over 9000km away, I am in Botswana and he stays in the UK but he gets to visit twice or three times a year or whenever he can and that’s the only time I get to have some breathing space and a little more sleep.

Most of the time it’s just me and my three bambinos. I do not have a house helper, which means it’s all me having to deal with the morning chaos getting the kids ready for school, and getting ready for my seven-thirty to four-thirty job. After work I rush home, I can’t be 2 minutes late to knock off or I will get stuck in traffic. I get home and get to prepare dinner while assisting my kids with homework.

My God, I am literally back in primary school with these kids, imagine each of them gets to bring two to three homework every day and a reading book that I have to sign. Thereafter I have to clean the house while they pack their school lunch and the little brother takes a bath, I only bath him in the mornings. The girls help with cleaning the dishes. When I decided not to have house help I needed to teach my kids and get them involved in house chores. You see when you have kids there really is no manual on what to do what when, but I felt they were ready to do a bit of some responsibility around the house, and the only way for them to learn was not to have house help.

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The first three months were a nightmare, the whole thing drained me I would go to bed without eating dinner because I would be exhausted. There are days I would cry by myself, I would get angry at my partner for not being there, I was losing myself, sometimes I would get so mad at my kids for leaving dirty dishes in the sink or for not making their beds properly, I was forgetting that they were only kids and they needed patience, besides who said it was all going to be easy, oh I know social media said so; the picture-perfect families that made everything look so effortless yet the truth was behind the scenes.

Today, six months later I am such a much better person, I learnt that with time everything will fall into place, soon they will be grown up and I am going to miss their mess. We just have to try one day at a time.


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Written by

Amanda Motsu

Amanda Motsu
My name is Amanda Motsu from Botswana. But most people call me Mandy. I am a 36-year-old full time working Mother of three; 2 daughters aged 10 and 9, and a son aged 6. I work as a Training Coordinator for the Ministry of Transport and Communications. And of course other jobs I don’t get paid for simply because I chose to be a Mother first. I get to be the Chef, Doctor Mom, Teacher Mom, the home accountant, the driver, the judge, the cleaner etc. My partner is the father to all our kids and he stays over 8000km away in the UK and he gets to visit at-least every four months. And God knows how much I always look forward to his homecomings because he gets to take over and I get to have a little breathing space, actually it’s the only time I get to gain a bit of weight from less stress and have some me-time; candlelit baths without having to worry about checking homework, getting the uniforms ready and a few movies. I look forward to sharing my journey of being a Mother, I believe if one or two people can relate from my stories, then someday we may just have the “Perfect Manual” on how to be a Mom.

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